"Jacqueline Koh
Plant your own garden and decorate your own soul, instead of waiting around for somebody to give you flowers"
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Wednesday, December 29, 2010 || 10:39 PM

http://screwmaturity.blogspot.com/2009/12/whats-new-year-without-new-year.html
(Resolution for 2010)

I can proudly say that i've achieved 3/5 out of the resolutions marked up ^_^
One of the brighter perks of not being able to accomplish everything is a subtle shout out to you that there're always things to improve on, matters you can deal better with& such.

2010 in a nutshell :

New class (2R02), New working place (Bar bar black sheep), Met tons of new friends which some became friends i'd confide to & are close with (Melissa, Hafiz, Yion, Solo), friendship w peck & jean espically grew a gulf deeper, went to Korea, Thailand, Tioman Island, Hongkong, & Xq's grandmother far off island, Inked something new horizontally across my shoulders, first time snorkelling & diving, cliff dived, full moon party, Disney land,first flea market as a vendor, virgin trip to shangri la's rose verenda which now i swear by it, suffered gastric reflux, stopped smoking, grew closer to my brother. In 2010 i realized my liking of B&J switched to Haagen Daz, cultivated a love for century egg porridges+percy pigs & became a movie buff. Spent TONS more time with my grandmother, am having a better relationship with my aunt as well :)
Also, in the year which we're going to bid goodbye to, I had my heart broken but got it fixed it back as well :)

we're always on the brink of the unknown
the quest for the truth
will be slowly unrevealed as
time goes by

Resolutions for 2011 :

1.Right Hip Tattoo
2.Inject sensitivity when treating others
think of how they might feel, what they're going through, be more patient, quit being so bo chup & remember that wordswords ... swords.
3. Better GPA
4. Own 10 pairs of wedges
HAHAHAHAHA yes.
5. Pave my way to university, look for options overseas as well as locally
6. Driving license
7. Save!
Stop splurging everything on trips.
8. Be healthy mentally & physically
Read more, exercise more. Eat healthier. Think healthy thoughts



|| 9:45 AM

Reasons why i love peck peck

1. Seen & heard me at my worst
I'll always remember how you cabbed down to look for me when i cried to you over the phone.
2. Because we're unglam adventure venturers together ^_^
& you make an awesome travelling bud because you'll push me to do things i fear, & i'll remind you when things go out of hand. I dont think i can find another person on earth whose willing to sleep with me in a place filled with mozzies & ahem, frogggggs. Minus the part where we missed flights & ferries.
3. She's like a guidebook, she helps me to see things clearly
By breaking down my words and giving me constructive alternative suggestions
4.Because you're a sarcastic bitch. Will always be hehehehe.
Different people show love differently, & this is how we show ours.
5.Thank you for not judging me for whatever i do, whatever i say, however i changed, habits, interests, etc.
6. Takes care of me
I'll remember how you stood up for me at Tioman when an idiot was doing shit to me.
7. Do tons of nonsensical shit
Sigh, other people just won't understand.



Tuesday, December 28, 2010 || 10:47 AM


Ok random little fact for you guys. These are mashed potatoes.

Anytime you see an ice cream ad on tv (scooped or being scooped all slow and creamy style) it is 90% of the time colored mashed potatoes because they look like ice cream but won’t melt like it under the off camera lighting.

xx

Anyway, some cute little nibbles.












I dream of refreshing breezes
|| 8:25 AM

Silence is a girl's loudest cry sometimes.

Argh, have to forgo the 100$ nett 2way tickets to manila.
Sigh.

Caught up with shuyi at amk. I love meeting my secondary school friends there because that place is where all our friendship blossomed. Even though it is not technically at the ever wonderful Anderson Secondary School, but it is still somewhere near the vicinity.
The S11, Macdonalds, Andersen ice cream, Jubilee, 159 bus stop.
These places emit a rather warm and nostalgic feeling when i walk pass or through them.
Thank you dearest for the lovely perfume, thank you for being as sweet as the scent :)

Met denise, chilled at the poolside as usual since i was just a 5 mins walk away from her place. You know the only downside about talking to someone who understands your thought process so well is that you have to break free of the invisible chain of false wonders faster.
Scorpios are all dreamers, right Rif?
We dream and fabricate stories in our minds SO MUCH we get afraid sometimes.

Aaaaah i feel like having some freezing cold plain yogurt ice cream topped with freshly diced strawberries :}

Monday, December 27, 2010 || 8:21 AM

You look at that particular someone, you know you've seen him/her before. You dig your mind thoroughly, but you still can't remember who they are and why they look so familiar. Yet you know, you've seen them before. Ever had this feeling?

Well anyway, yesterday while working, two dudes sat down for a drink, & they ordered quite a few bottles of erdinger dark. Chatted abit with them, told one of them he looks strikingly familiar. Kept thinking about it, & i finally recalled where i saw them from! Indochines! They're the band members of cats in e cradle! I remember them because they're able to switch roles many many times and still perform up to the audience's expectations :)
xxx

Just got back from town, had dinner with clovie, max & toto. Teppanyaki! Caught Meet the fockers, it was allright, not too bad :}
Before the year ends there're still two more movies for me to catch! Tourist & Gulliver's travels!
MOVIE BUFFFF!!!

Anyway mummy has a grand plan brewing up hehehehehehe.
EXCITED MUCH.
Will update if it DOES happens.


Saturday, December 25, 2010 || 11:53 PM








Doubt is a pain too lonely to know that faith is his twin brother




Friday, December 24, 2010 || 10:56 AM


Festive seasons aren't all about giving& receiving something tangible. For me, it's more about making the effort to meet friends up, making time to send a lovely text. Most people don't really bother about the origins of these festive days, it's a nature call for friends to meet up, it's a convenient excuse to pig out & eat eat eat, drink drank & get yourself drunk.

24/12/10

baking with angel + jpot dinner w family + eski bar w 1r02 sweethearts :)

Baking w angel= waking at 7ish, falling back to sleep till the wake up sms jolted me awake, raided the fridge, prepared ingredients, expedite baking, shared youtube vids (hello tiger eyes), bitched lol.


VERY VERY TASTY CUPPYS HEHE

Jpot dinner w family = heheheh the main highlight was the after dinner because mummy got me heels, wanted to buy some boots but i look mad fugly in it, should give the lovely footwear some credit by letting them rest in someone's wardrobe who has better legs and calves sculpted to fit their purpose :)

while heading to raffles place, harbourfront had this mad long queue which i bloody had to re-queue 4 times because of my ezlink card mis-match (x2) + insufficient value (x2) lol. I know you might be wondering, where the hell do i get so many cards from? Ask my mum, she's a hoarder of ezlink cards LOL. & why do i have to re-queue? Because i apparently didnt have the brains to ask my mum (who successfully tapped inside) for all the cards at once.




Anyway, i have no idea how the brains of my brother works, he solves puzzles in an instant, it's like, he just has to take one glance, and he knows which blocks are his obstacles and he knows how to maneuver them so that the coast will be clear. For me, i'm stuck till he comes to my aid.

eski bar = my health problems still forbids me to have any contact with alcoholic drinks.... so i erm had a virgin mojito (which cost 16.90$!) throat cutter! But it's nice to have some time spent with old friends (not theoretically but it feels that way!)








Wednesday, December 22, 2010 || 11:22 PM

Metal Beaded Dress x Stylestalker
Corset Tie Sweater x Spring and Clifton
Black Crochet Dress x WPG


Wow wow wow.
If you haven't yet noticed, i've an eye for sequin, corset, symmetry &cutout details.
Particular attraction for visual balance.
I love love love dark colors.

Anyway, i had 2 slightly disturbing dreams. Maybe they're paired up in such a manner to hint in a subtle way the impossibility in reality.
HTC+ phonecall + impossible coincidence + headless friend + heartless being
Y + R + hammock + breakup ?!?!!!!!???????

what the fuck?!

|| 10:12 AM

This guy is awesome in his transactions!
I mean, there's a reason why his vid reflects 20million viewers ;)
Raping the repeat button for these two awesome tracks.
Caught rapunzel w xq,syah& effa yesterday, i'm usually not a fan of cartoons but i think i might have a special liking for this particular long haired blondie ^_^
ANYWAY, guess who called me this morning? Havent yet heard my pet name in a long long time.


Busy converting oxygen to carbon dioxide
Monday, December 20, 2010 || 11:49 AM


Wow.... Putting the fact that bubbles do burst very beautifully aside, these pictures make me wanna invest in a good camera. To capture the little moments and the tiniest details in life. I appreciate the fact that there're some people who will actually stop in their tracks, look at broken seashells/shattered glass bottles and actually feel that they're artistic in a different manner. Imperfections are subjective :)
Some things are beautifully broken , & when they appear to be even more so when you look at the details which most will overlook :)
Went to peck's bf's house - max, & saw this awesome Eiffel tower made up of Lego! Quite intricately done, puzzled up by the hands of his house-mates i guess.
Talked to peck about this particular word I've always been afraid to use, because that word reflects weakness & insecurity. Because i can relate to that word so deeply i am afraid if i actually use it, it might pounce onto me. Guess what word it is? :)

NEWAY, I'm itching to spend! I need to spend !!!!!!!!

xx

Anyway, these are picts from the FAILED nutella cupcake baking session with namesake.
The mix blossomed and exploded in the oven, overflowing, & destroying the look of how a natural cuppy will look like. Despite trying to clean up the bits & pieces stuck on the outer cuppy paper, it was still a huge mess and we both decided it was aesthetically dead. The only way we could think of to make it better looking is to layer the current cuppy paper with another. And guess what, during the gathering, everybody noticed and asked why we did what we did, & how they're supposed to eat while me & namesake just looked at each other and laughed. LOL.
But hey, in our defense, the cuppys tasted good! Erm, i think mainly because it's nutella, & how wrong can nutella go? Heee heeee ^_^


& both of us started eating the crumbs left on the pan with scissors (because i was too lazy to go get proper eating equipments - forks/spoons) & you know in life, we always have to learn to MAKE DO, and there were two scissors right in front of us, and within reach so yeah, hahahahaha. We're bringing friendship to a whole new level! I wouldnt mind eating with you again ms jacqie with scissors, in a restaurant, in a kopitiam, my house, your house or whereever ;)

you're never fully dressed without a smile, miss beautiful :)
Saturday, December 18, 2010 || 8:37 AM

awwww !!! sweet max?!

I highly suspect there's an invasion of gas along the line of my disgestive system (literally)& lungs. It's fucking uncomfortable to the max. Burps are clouded along with some liquid which is trapped along my windpipe. Sometimes the burps aren't released, & are pushed back into my body. I'm going to enter an attack of ginger tea tomorrow. Now, i'll just make do with warm water to make myself feel better.

On a lighter note, stayed home the entire day tumblr-ing, online shopping, reading, youtube-ing for songs & just enjoying the sweet sweet feeling of being in the most comfortable places on earth.

Reached home at 4am last morning after work. Been so long since i last drained myself out till this extent. Feels good to just slump my body on bed & let that headache of mine go away with a long deep sleep.


1:01am
hi my baby!!!!
your percy pigs are lonely :(
HEY BABY
how was town with xd?
hahahahaha!
percy pigs need my tummy !
i feel like eating them now!!!!!!!!!

awwww...............
xx

I wish i can call them mine...




Try living life, instead of just having one.
Thursday, December 16, 2010 || 8:43 AM

Love yourself.
Make peace with who you are
and where you are at this moment in time.

Listen to your heart.
If you can’t hear what it’s saying in this noisy world,
make time for yourself. Enjoy your own company.
Let your mind wander among the stars.

Try. Take chances. Make mistakes.
Life can be messy and confusing, but it’s also full of surprises.
The next rock in your path may be a stepping stone.

Be happy. When you don’t have what you want,
want what you have. Make do.
That’s a well-kept secret of contentment.

There aren’t any shortcuts to tomorrow.
You have to make your own day.
To know where you’re going is only part of it.
You need to know where you’ve been too.
And if you get lost, don’t worry.
The people who love you will find you.
Count on it.

Life isn’t days and years.
It’s what you do with time
and with all the goodness and grace
that’s inside of you.
Make a beautiful life…
The kind of life you deserve.

Everybody's everywhere but here
|| 6:01 AM



Setting off in a jetplane/ rocking a boat in the choppy seas/ bullet trains
anywhere, anywhere but here.
Hafiz's going to paris & london, taffy's forever wandering around this globe, she has it in her fingertips, denise's in her last destination, it's her 3rd country this month, babe's heading for the bullettrain to celebrate a wintery white xmas.
I'm so jealous! but i know my turn will come ;)
Horse warriors, you ready for me& my fellow warrior no 2? I AM NO 1!!!!!!!
;) See y'all in 2011!


It's so amazing how when this particular something is given to you by somebody, the rater from 'this is useless' shoots up to 'this is really precious'
<3

2 more weeks till the end of 2010.
I'm quite excited to chart up my 2011's resolution!
*bounces*

Oh yesss i thought Tron Legacy was really good! Go watch it!
When i took my hp out to reply a text, the person beside me told me to switch it off! And after that she answered a call herself! Omg!


I realize, out of 5 people who made up my life, i dont talk to 4 anymore
Wednesday, December 15, 2010 || 7:36 AM

Hi, i miss you, I miss your humor, & how my mum adores you.
You are my role model& I look up to you.
That day when you walked down the aisle with your beautiful bride, I was sure, she is going to be one of the most blessed woman ever.
I wish i could shower you both with my blessings. But i couldn't bear to watch this scene unfolding, so i didnt show up. I'm sorry.
Your happiest day, is also one of the most heart wrenching day of my life.
I also wonder whether if that particular day, i passed you that particular something, would things be different?
The keyring which is supposedly a memento, i 'stole' it from my mum, and hung it with my keys. I'm afraid to forget you.
But from the bottom of my heart, i know she's the one who can give you happiness.
I miss you.
I regret that we don't even talk now.


Hi, my best friend, and my soul mate. I'm sorry things had to turn out this way. I'm sorry i betrayed you because i promised things i couldn't have managed to adhere to. I'm sorry i lusted after other things/love. I'm sorry. You make up a big part of my heart. I'm glad that you're still standing strong in what you believe in & continue to be this way, do not waiver. Please don't be like me. I know you're leading a very fulfilling life albeit the many circumstances which are rounding you up. I'm sure you'll get through them. Thank you for teaching me how to be humble, and to be respectful. Thank you for many things you taught me. I am sure i wouldn't be who i am right now without you. Thank you for being the best friend i can ever have. I wish i could be there for you but i dont know how to. I love you. Forever.

Hi, the last sentence you told me was 'Go fucking reflect. Your attitude sucks. You're a fucking liar and a bitch.' It hurts to call you to receive a 'who are you?' at the other line. Till now I've no idea what triggered all these. You despise me, you hate me. I know. I wonder why. I wish you know that i still think about the random funny shit things we do, having very random phone calls, laughing to Mr Bean together. You're the one who helped paved my road to wanting to be an entrepreneur. My dreams, your dreams, they're all tangled together. Sadly, it's a mess. A tangled mess. You are probably the only one who understands my gibberish & is willing to entertain me. I wish old times will reel back.

Hi, I am in a loss of words because I've too much to say. From the things i could have done, and couldn't have done. The many things i should have, but didnt. I dont blame you for what you did, it's human nature& you had no strings attached.
I hope we'd bump into one another & start a fresh friendship from there.
I think about you all the time. Thank you for the good times.

Hi mum, my biggest regret in my 18 years is that particular sentence which i always want to snatch it back immediately when it sprung out of my mouth. I know it hurt you deeply.
These were the words i said 'You're not fit to be my mother'. You're the best mother i could ever ask for, and i love you. I love you more than i can ever love anybody else.



Tuesday, December 14, 2010 || 6:59 AM

Hahahahah! I just realized my caretaker/maid, for 16years ( & still counting) has facebook!
Anyway, had a pretty soul strucking short convo with stitchy stitch. Mmmm, what she said was pretty true anyway. 'Whats the point, you keep staring & looking, it's not as if blah will jump out. Even if blah comes out, you'll probably hide anyway.'
They attack, you withdraw.
You withdraw
Re draw
No re, anymore
Just take back a few steps & be back in the safe zone.
Yes, i am ms pussy.
Ms pussy is me.

Anywayzxz, first paper's tomorrow! Awesome that i only have 2 papers.
Gosh, i wanted to blog abt smthg but i forgot what!
Nevermind, things which i forget are probably not that important anyway ;)






Baby says I can't come with him
And I had read all of this in his eyes
Long before he even said so
Why go, I asked
You know and I know why
And it'll be just as quiet when I leave
As it was when I first got here
I don't expect anything
I don't expect anything

Take care
I've been hurt before
Too much time spend on closing doors
You may hate me, but I'll remember to love you
Goodbye
Don't cry
You know why
And it'll be just as quiet when I leave
As it was when I first got here
I don't expect anything
I don't expect anything

All the waves of blame arrange as broken scenery
As they steal your best memories away
What if I was someone different in your only history?
Would you feel the same
As I walk out the door
Never to see your face again
Never to see your face again

And it'll be just as quiet when I leave
As it was when I first got here
It'll be just as quiet when I leave
As it was when I first got here
I don't expect anything
I don't expect anything
I don't expect anything
I don't expect anything
I don't expect anything
I don't expect anything to change when I leave




Love their way of doing things :)

Monday, December 13, 2010 || 3:57 AM




Don't make decisions when you're angry, & don't make promises when you're happy.

Tomatoes taste really good with sugar, & strawberries taste just as well with honey.
It's like, both's a pairing.
You know that? :)


xxx
Anyway, just for laughs!